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He’s got a big birthday coming up soon and doesn’t want cards, presents, a party or a cake, just a gorgeous girl for both of us to play with. He wants anything-goes sex with toys, role-playing, girl-on-girl action, wickedness and filth. He doesn’t care who this female is. He’ll even pay top whack for high-class hooker. But what I have to do is show my commitment to pleasing him, by setting the whole thing up. He’s leaving everything in my hands. It’s my call.

The only stipulation is that it happens. I fear that if I don’t come up with the goods, then he’ll dump me. Things haven’t been going too well between us lately. There have been rows about money, his drinking, my family and me wanting children. I’m desperately in love with him – and he knows it. I’d do anything to make him happy and please him.

But I just don’t know if I can do this. We’ve been together for many years but the last couple haven’t been good


T SAYS: Stand up for yourself and tell your man that this is not for you. It doesn’t matter how many times he bangs the table. You won’t be backed into a corner or held to ransom by anyone. If having a threesome was something that you both wanted to do, then that would be very different. But I hate the fact he’s using this idea as a stick to beat you with. This isn’t a sexy treat, it’s an ultimatum and a threat – in others words, if you don’t do this for me, then we’re over. No-one can conduct an adult relationship on those terms. Tell him to stop playing games.

Talk to him about all the problem areas in your relationship because I strongly suspect that there is fault on both sides here. I understand that you love your family, but do you really help things by winding them up and telling them every little thing about your relationship? Aren’t some things personal and private? Sadly, if the truth of the matter is that you and he are simply going through the motions these days, then one of you needs to find the courage to put this beast out of it’s misery. Is that finally going to be you?

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